Sunday 22 April 2012

Returning to work after maternity leave

Today was my first day back at work after 9 months of maternity leave, and I'm not sure if it is ok to say it, but I enjoyed it.  Nine months of spending twentyfour/seven with my little man has meant that having a bit of time away from him felt great.

I enjoyed it so much, that I took a casual stroll home.  No rushing to get back, no pushchair to push, no heavy sling on my shoulders, no baby in my arms, just me.  I knew that he would be in bed by the time I got home and it didn't bother me.  I am only working two days a week so it isn't like I will hardly see him, I will still be there most of the time but I want the right to enjoy those two days without feeling guilty for leaving him.

I'm not going to lie and say that I didn't think about him, I did, but mostly when prompted with a little baby in front of me, or when asked about him.  Other than then I enjoyed being me, the independant, individual me.  People directed questions to me, looking at my face as they spoke, no derailing mid sentence with an 'oh isn't that smile adorable' and no baby voices.  It was more than refreshing.



father and child,
Dylan and Daddy enjoying time together


If you had asked me two months ago how I felt about returning to work, I would have told you that I was dreading it, that I wanted to stay at home for as long as I could, and that I was worried about how the little dude would cope.  If you had asked me this morning, I would have told you that I was excited, nervous and ready for it.  It is amazing how quickly things can change, but I was ready, I am ready to get a bit of the other 'me' back again.

So from now on, I am a working mum.  Maybe only part time, but I work.  I contribute towards the household,  and I leave my child two days a week to work.  I am lucky to have a supportive family, and my mum will be having him one day and the bloke on the other, so we don't have to fork out on nursery and I think it will be great for Dylan to spend some quality time with his grandma and daddy without me there. 

I know that there will be times when I hate leaving my little baby to go back to work, and I am dreading missing those all important firsts, but I think rediscovering myself and my independance is important too.  Maybe the bloke deserves to be there for some of the firsts as well?  There are so many possible things to witness that even a SAHM surely can't be there for them all anyway.  

Did you feel ready before you went back to work, or were you rushed into it?


9 comments:

  1. I have to say i'm on materity leave until September but i'm already dreading going back! Glad you're first day went well though lovely xxx

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    Replies
    1. hopefully you will feel reasdy by september. Good luck!

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  2. Great post. With my first I hated going back, and had 2 years off almost. This time at the moment I am supply teaching so even though I am "available" the reality is so far I've only done 5 days. But I am applying for jobs for the new start in September, and I think it will most likely be full time, which saddens me.

    I think 2 days is perfect. You get to be you" and Mummy. I hope I can find a part time position so I can continue to be at home as well as discover who I am again. Aly x

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    Replies
    1. It is a shame that we can't all work our preference. I am lucky that I don't have to work full time as I really don't want to, but I understand that some people have no choice.

      Good luck with the job hunt!

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  3. Hello, loved reading your blog :) so pleased to hear that you've got a perfect balance for you and your family. Am at home full-time with my son which is right for us but all mummies deserve to have a home life which is right for them..good for you x

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  4. Loved reading this! I have been off for ten months with my son Lucas! I have been suffering really bad post natal depression in the highest form and now leaving my baby is making me feel rock bottom! I will have him Monday and he is going to nursery tues to thurs and my mother inlaw is having him every Friday! I still feel like I need extra time to bind with him! I hope this is the right move! Fingers crossed x

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  5. Hi, well I'm due to go back to work on tuesday but I don't want to as my baby boy got chicken pox at the moment so when I explain to work I won't be coming in all I got well your booked in to training I not leaving my baby boy with my mother its not fair its my job to look after him he is my child. Grrr work and I am only doing 2 days a week so its not like I'm full time at all.

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