The Last Summer Before School

There are only 3 more nursery days left and then a long 6 weeks awaits us. We have plenty of plans both for bigger adventures and smaller ones and I know August will be full of laughter, sunshine, late evenings and far too much ice cream.

And then September will arrive and it is all change.  Dylan heads into year four (year four, seriously, how have I got a child that big?), Archie enters his last year at his Infant School and my baby boy is off to big school.

In all honesty, I can't wait.  He is so ready, so far past ready sometimes and his nursery agrees.  He knows the school so well, he knows the building and the playground, the staff and the uniform, he has been in the playground almost every day since he was tiny and he is so confident following his brothers there.  I have already put aside some trousers that haven't given up yet and bought him some polo shirts in the size up from what he wears just incase of a growth spurt / to get him through the first year and we will be completely ready by the time September arrives.

Us both being ready for this new adventure doesn't make it any less though. I still watched him run into his new classroom during the transition sessions and I saw that teeny tiny baby who spent his first weeks in special care with tubes and wires coming in all directions.  I remember vividly the moment I was told why he was poorly and what his prognosis was.  I can feel the emotions from those first weeks and months and I am utterly amazed that we made it all this way and that both of us are the people we are now.  Finn is fearless, strong, determined, smart, loving and full of ideas. It isn't just my world he will change. It is still a miracle that the little baby has become this big boy and I have so much pride, just the same as all the other parents stood their with their first borns, last borns, only children. 

Nothing about the school feels new to me, I have been sending my children there for four years, I am on the PTFA, I am a school governor, I know my way around but it is a whole new experience being the parent of Finn there and this three year journey will be different to the others.  

In the meantime, I have one summer left with him, those long six weeks to cement in my mind who he is before these new influences.  Finn is so absolutely full of character, he doesn't conform, he is himself.  He is funny, so incredibly confident, so sure of himself and I want his teachers to see this, to nurture these parts of him whilst also maybe helping him to conform a little bit too.  This is the last summer before school to enjoy him as a preschooler.  In September we have a staggered start so Archie will go back for two weeks before Finn starts and then he is part time for a couple of weeks too, but it is all rolling into that full time school that will dominate the next few years and this is our last window of freedom beforehand.

I won't be dreading September or considering other options, Finn is so ready for school and I have confidence that they can handle him too. We can't wait for this new chapter in his life, but it certainly doesn't mean any less because of that and if the tears writing this post are anything to go by, I am sure I will crying with the other parents on his first day still!

Finn wears a gifted Maxomorra romper from Nolu 

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Before you turn Four

At three you can still be considered a toddler, but Archie, when you wake up you will be four and I will have to admit that that phase of your life has passed.  The countdown to school has began and you are ready for it in so many ways.  Really, you stopped being a toddler quite a while ago but behind the excitement of each new stage, I am reluctant to let go of the last one.

Three was the year we cut off your beautiful hair and I cried real tears in the middle of the hairdressers.  I have found peace with your new style and it suits you.  You are never mistaken for a girl anymore, it doesn't get in your face as you run and hair washes are so much easier.  It was the right choice (I will begrudgingly admit) but I did love your long blonde locks.

Every year you change so much and I can see quite how much you have grown since I wrote to you one year ago.  You are still exactly the same though, unapologetically you, determined, loyal, loving and wild.  I wrote as you turned two about how you were happier with your brother around and that is still true - you fit in perfectly in our big family, a playful little brother and a loving big one.  You and Dylan are the best of friends (although you fight like only brothers can), you and Finn are becoming real playmates now and you are so caring with Cora.  I look at the photos from the day before you turned one and I still recognise those expressions, that you.

You are happiest naked and have refused to wear any form of pyjamas or clothes around the house for a while now.  You have no problem snuggling under a blanket with me though, warming your icy feet on my skin and cuddling in close.  You still love to cuddle and I have to admit you give the best cuddles.  You can cheer me up in seconds with you arms around my neck and I dread the day you stop wanting to be so close. 

Your imagination has really developed this year, you talk absolute nonsense sometimes and you and Dylan are often in your own world together.  I love listening at your door after I put you to bed as you stay up and chat and watching you playing with your Lego, singing made up songs as you do.  This imagination did lead to the 'Mystery bandit' in our house who was responsible for all kinds of mischief and was never seen at the same time as you.  He has thankfully gone now although things are still blamed on him (by all members of the family).

As a three year old you became a big brother (again) and took it all in your stride as you always do.  You are wonderful with Cora and she is a lucky little girl to have you as a big brother.

At three you were bright, sociable, loving, energetic and bold.  You have learned to concentrate on things a little better, sit still a little longer, climb a little higher and communicate a little clearer.  I can't wait to see what adventures four has in stock for you.

Before you turn four, as I kiss you goodnight for the last time as my three year old, I just want you to know how truly loved you are

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Nun Night Three Year Old

Four years ago to this day I was playing Bingo.  I was having what I now know are contractions every few minutes, but at the time I was convinced that they were just Braxton Hicks.  Four years ago I was on the verge of becoming a mama and I had no idea what I was in for.  I couldn't foresee this little boy that stands before me now, so very nearly four, so ready for something big, yet so young still in so many ways.

This last year has been busy, we have had so many adventures, you have welcomed another little brother into your life and you have done it beautifully, despite the fact nothing really went to plan. Every day we have played, explored, socialised, learned and loved.  This has been the year that you learned to read, to add, to subtract, to ask such intricate questions, to climb, to run with a football, to open a ringpull, to dress yourself, to play memory and to work a tablet.  

You are about to turn four which means school is on the horizon and in so many ways you are oh so ready.  You cannot wait to dress in your smart blue uniform and head off into your purple classroom.  You want to make new friends, play with their toys and discover more about yourself and the world.  You are starting to ask questions that I struggle to answer, and I hope school will encourage your curiosity even further.  We have been discussing electricity a lot recently, you are so fascinated by it all and how things are made is another great topic.  My to do list for the week includes things like googling the inside of a telegraph pole, finding out the temperature that fossil fuels are burned at and coming up with the best answer for how rocks got onto the earth.  You challenge me every day, and I love being on this journey of learning with you.

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