What I have Learned in the Past Two Months

I had my first four babies all so close together, that the newborn stage still felt like a recent memory when the next baby came along, but there has been a gap of over five years this time and there was so much I had forgotten over those years.  Rex is now two months (and a bit - first thing I remembered is how much longer it takes to get anything done with a newborn) and I thought I would share a few things I have learned (or re-learned) over the past two months

1. How easy it was to forget the sleep deprivation

We all know that new babies don't sleep through the night, but we don't really understand what that means or how it feels unless it is our reality.  I knew it of course, but I had forgot how the lack of real sleep affects my functions and how unrelenting it is as a breasfeeding mother who can't get anyone else to help with the night feeds.  I think what I find hardest is the not knowing, when some nights he can do a long stretch and others he seems to wake every twenty minutes.  Each night I go to bed with no idea how much sleep I am actually going to get and whether I will be able to function as a human in the morning!

2. How quickly the heart expands to fit another child

I worried that our hearts and lives were full already, that four children is so many without adding in a fifth, but I forgot how quickly our hearts expand to fit in one more.  I don't have to share my love between them, spreading it thinner with each new baby, it grows instead each time in ways I cannot explain.  The love I have for each child is unique and individual and as powerful as if there were only one.

3. The benefits of a bigger age gap

This is all new to me, previously I had four babies aged four and under so apart from the first, I navigated the baby days with another baby or toddler in tow.  Dylan got to attend baby massage and sensory groups but none of the others could do any baby centric activities.  I think they got so much from having siblings close in age, but it means I feel like a new mum again with Rex, having so many hours a day with just him to occupy me.  Having a bigger age gap also means the other children are much more independent, they don't need the same level of attention to keep them safe and they are able to help out with the baby, reading him stories, cuddling him and singing him songs.  They are more helpful and less of a liability!

4. The need to change a little boy's nappy quickly

Anyone who has a little boy will know what I mean by this.  I was brutally reminded when Rex weed all over my last pair of clean leggings!

5. How quickly newborns grow

He was born 7lb 13oz and in the past 2.5 months I have had to pack away three different sizes of clothes already, each with sadness about the stage left behind.  This newborn stage may well be my favourite but it is also the shortest and they grow so fast and learn so much every day.  Of course it is bittersweet because growing means they start sleeping better, they start responding more and those early smiles just make everything so much easier. 

6. How giant my other children are

I have referred to Cora as 'Tiny Girl' for so long, she is still one of the smallest in her class, with friends whose shoulders she only just reaches, but with a new baby around, she just seems giant.  She is so large, so capable and not tiny in the slightest.  Don't even get me started on the size of my ten year old whose feet are now the same size as mine - it is hard to believe he was ever that small! 

7. That I can do it all . . . but not for long

For the first week I was running on adrenaline.  I thought I could do it all and I was.  I was cooking, cleaning, doing school runs and taking things on with the belief I would always feel that great. Somewhere around day 8 the tiredness kicked in, the hormones started to balance and I just felt exhausted.  I regretted the fact that I had started doing it all as the expectation seemed to be that I was capable, but it is easy to burn out.  I needed to stop trying to be a martyr and accept the help I was offered and know my limits. 

 

8. The importance of my village

I know how privileged I am to have a village, to have friends and family locally and I realised that when Rex was born.  Friends helped with school runs as we worked out how to balance the two separate schools and clubs, they sent cakes and supplies, they helped entertain the bigger children and they were always there to listen and support.  Adjusting to a new baby was made so much easier knowing I was surrounded by people that wanted to help us.

This newborn stage is coming to an end, my tiny baby is growing daily, learning new skills, becoming more alert and reminding me of all that is to come. 

Read more ⇨

A Letter to my Pregnant Self

Dear Me, 6 years ago,

You will be fine.

Everything is about to change, and you won't really appreciate just how much until it does.  People have tried to tell you, but you are so focused on pregnancy and the birth that anything beyond seems too far off still.  You may not know what to do at times, but that is fine, parenthood is about learning and all those people doling out advice had to learn once upon a time too.

It is all going to matter so incredibly much, and then suddenly it isn't, but the things that will be important to you are important.  You will become obsessed with breastfeeding, the contents of your baby's nappy, first foods, the average crawling age and what brand of babywipes to buy.  You will chat for hours about these things without getting even a little bit bored because that is your everyday.  You will find friends who find these things just as fascinating, who can debate baby led weaning vs puree all afternoon over a cup of luke warm tea.  And then one day none of it will matter again, you will move on and find it strange how you were ever so fascinated.  Parenthood goes in cycles and this baby stage that you are about to dive headfirst into is so incredibly intense but so short too.

Make the most of it, as much as you can of course.  You don't have to appreciate every moment, nobody ever will, but try to stop sometimes and sniff his little head.  When he falls asleep, watch his chest rise and fall and think about how you feel.  When you feed him lying down in your bed, take the time to appreciate how well he seems to slot in, how your body curves around him so naturally.  When he sleeps, and the house is silent, drink your freshly made cup of tea and just sit.  It won't always be this hard, it won't always be this easy.

The best piece of advice I can give you is not to worry so much about 'the book'.  You will try and do everything 'right', but your baby is unique.  You will learn over time to parent your child not 'a child', accept that he will be faster and slower than average, that he will sleep through when he is ready, he will drink until he is full and he will eventually crawl and walk.  Stop and listen to him, listen to yourself and do what feels natural, chances are it is the right thing.

Some people will tell you that there are things you can't do once you have a child - it isn't true.  It might not be as easy, but you are going to be the Mum, you get to make the rules.  If you want to go out for dinner late then take a pram for him to sleep in.  If you want to climb a mountain then get a good sling to wear him on your back.  If you want to travel and see the world then you can, and you get to see it through a child's eyes too, it will be magical.  Don't let having children hold you back from achieving what you want, but equally know that being a Mummy is more than enough.  Don't judge yourself against others, just be the best version of you that you can be.

You may wonder what the future holds but I am not going to give anything away.  It will be full of surprises, it will challenge you, make you question yourself but ultimately you will end up richer -your heart and home will be overflowing with love and you will be happy.  Take each day as it comes, appreciate the small things, let your baby be little whilst you still can.  Take a deep breath, count your blessings and enjoy the adventures of parenthood.

Love from Me, now.

p.s Make sure you always check out baby events to find the best deals - nobody will warn you quite how satisfying saving money on the necessities is! Tesco have one on at the moment and there is still a week left to grab some savings.

Disclaimer : In association with Tesco

Read more ⇨

The Nights

The nights are long with a baby, and too short at the same time.  We see far too much of them, every half an hour some nights but we wake up wishing that morning was a little later, that we could spend longer tucked up.

Cora's sleep is erratic, we have nights where she sleeps well and nights where we she seems to have her eyes open more than shut.  I love the ease of breastfeeding, that I don't have to leave my bed in the night, that I don't have to really wake up to feed my baby.  When she first wakes up, I can lift her on to me and we both drift off together.  

During the night, she feeds when she is hungry, I help her, half asleep myself.  She is close enough that she doesn't need to cry out for me.  Her brothers don't hear her and I sleep lightly so that when she stirs I wake.  

I wake up in the morning to the sound of her breathing, her tiny body against mine.  The days are as long as the nights and so busy with her brothers but these nights are ours, they are the time we can be close.  The early morning, as the light slips in between the curtains and the house is still so peaceful before the chaos, this is our time.  I can watch her sleeping, marvel at how tiny and new she still is, study her features, breathe in that sweet milky smell.  It is our time to just be, in the way I wish I had appreciated more with the first baby.  

The baby phase is far too short and before I know it this little girl of mine will be sleeping independently in her crib, she won't need me in the same way she does now, so completely.  I will only be her whole world for such a short time, and the nights are where I can stop and remember that, and enjoy it, even if my eyes are stinging from the lack of sleep and the morning alarm is coming around too quickly.

Of course I want her to 'sleep through' in some ways - a long stretch of sleep sounds both wonderful and mythical at the moment.  The idea of my little baby sleeping all night is also a little sad though too - another sign that she is growing up, leaving the last phase behind and entering a new one.  For now we are just going with the flow, knowing (and reminding myself regularly) that things won't be like this forever.

Read more ⇨

Merci Maman Giveaway

We know Merci Maman for their beautifully engraved jewellery, but they have recently expanded their range and offer a home range full of gorgeous embroidered baby gifts.  We were sent a personalised gift box for Cora  and it arrived equisitely packaged in a white box and wrapped in tissue paper.

The gift set contains a hooded towel, two muslins and a comforter, each personalised with her name.  This is a perfect gift for a baby with a more unusual name and definitely something to be saved in the baby box.  

The girl's box has both a pink and white muslin and a choice of two comforters.  The muslins are pretty big (75 x 75) and the comforter is the perfect size for little arms to cuddle.

Merci Maman offer free delivery with a choice to upgrade it to next day delivery if you need it sooner. 

The towel is 100% cotton and feels lovely and soft. It is ideal for baby bathtime and Cora looks so snuggly in hers.

Not only was I sent one to review, I also have an embroidered gift box just like this one to giveaway.  The winner can pick either the pink or blue set and personalise it with the name of your choice.  Entry is simple via the rafflecopter form below.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Read more ⇨

Baby Bundle Baby Rocker

At eleven weeks, Cora is starting to leave the fourth trimester.  She has always been a baby that wants to be held, she loves to be close and she definitely knows who her mama is.  She has spent lots of time in the sling around the house as that is where she is most content and I have loved this transition phase and watching her become more confident being put down.

She now spends periods of her day 'playing' or at least kicking her legs around and stretching out away from me and we have been using her Bababing baby rocker from Baby Bundle lots.  

This rocker is simple and perfect for little babies.  The seat is small and cosy so they feel secure and the more muted colours provide stimulation without it being too much.  Cora is content and happy in there and she is starting to reach out for the toys now.  The rocker comes with two toys, but her youngest big brother is rather fond of pinching one as they are attached with velcro and easy to pull off.

One of my favourite features of this rocker is just how portable it is.  It folds down really easily and is easy to transport and it is incredibly light.  These photos were taken at the beach hut last weekend as it was ideal to pop in the car and to give Cora somewhere safe to play whilst we were out.  

I don't think this rocker will last past about 4 months for my long baby (she is currently 2.5 months), and the velcro shoulder straps are almost too small now, but I will continue to use it just with the waist straps which have plenty of growing room and are handily hidden until the grey fabric.  

I do think this is a great rocker, I love that there are two height positions, how portable it is and easy to store (especially with a one year old who will climb on anything he can reach) and the colours are lovely.  

Disclosure : I was sent this rocker for the purpose of this review but all thoughts and opinions are completely my own. 

Read more ⇨

2 Months Baby Girl

At two months old I am already starting to see that Cora doesn't want to stay a baby for long.  Everyone warned me when she arrived that girls are often quicker to meet their milestones, that they don't stay babies as long and she is proving them right.  Cora's head control is quite impressive and she loves to be sat up with me just holding her waist.  She always looks so curious and inquisitive and I can see her taking everything in.  

At 6 weeks she started smiling, but it was 7 weeks before I got one my way (Her brothers are far more worthy of smiles it seems) and at 2 months she is still a very serious baby, only giving smiles at certain times of day and making you really work for them.

At 2 months old, Cora seems to be growing so fast.  She is filling out her 0-3 month clothing and she has definitely lost that weightlessness that newborns have.  I imagine she is somewhere between 12 and 13 pounds now but I haven't had her weighed for a couple of weeks.  She no longer curls up in the fetal position and instead prefers to spread out and push her legs out straight.

Cora is still happiest on me, she loves being in the sling, she feeds very regularly (but goes 6-7 hours at night) and she wants to sleep close.  She happily goes down in her crib at night though and can settle her self to sleep if I put her on her tummy.  She will only sleep on her tummy at all times still, although if she is really tired she will fall asleep in the car seat.  Her dislike for being on her back means she can do an hour in the car easily before she succumbs to sleep - My newborns really don't like the car very much! 

Two months in to parenting four and I feel like there are always going to be different challenges.  I was worried about the summer holidays and having all four at home, but it has been wonderful and we have made it work and carried on with our adventures.  Now my fears are around the school runs and being out the house on time.  I am sure we will find our groove and having some time with just the babies is going to be lovely too.  

Two month old Cora is very chilled out as long as she knows that I am close.  She is happy to sleep in her own space and I can put her down for short periods during the day too.  She adores her brothers already and the love is mutual.  She is growing bigger and stronger every day and losing the little things that make her seem like a newborn.  Slow down please baby girl!!

Read more ⇨

Pure Love

This is a paid advertorial for WaterWipes

Every morning since Cora was born, we have done the first feed of the day in the same way. After a long night of feeds and nappy changes and restless sleep, I take off my pyjama top and her sleepsuit and we snuggle up together, her skin against mine. On the chillier mornings we pull the duvet around us, on the warmer ones we just lie there together, enjoying the slow pace, the quiet of just us two and the feeling of skin to skin. It is one of my favourite parts of the day, a way of connecting before the madness of the school runs and a noisy house.

There is no better way to wind down after a busy weekend than with those same special skin to skin cuddles and Sunday night is hairwash night for the boys and bath night for my baby girl and I. Her first baths are always with me, so that we can have skin to skin, relax and unwind together. We cuddle and feed and enjoy the calm of her brothers being in bed. She would probably fall asleep on my chest in the water if we stayed in any longer.

I read about the wonders of it during pregnancy and all of my birth plans have stipulated immediate skin to skin. I can only imagine how cold and scary the world is after nine months in the womb and the familiar sound of my heart beating, the reassurance of my warmth and smell and the closeness to milk has offered them comfort, and continues to for weeks and months. With Cora we stayed together for hours having our first skin to skin cuddle, there was no rush as we were at home for either of us to get dressed and it felt natural and perfect.


Skin to skin can regulate baby's biology and is evidence of how our bodies continue to care for and nurture our children long past the nine months we spend growing them. In this wonderful video 'Pure Love' from WaterWipes  they show how being on their mama's chest can regulate baby's heart rate, body temperature and oxygen levels as well as keeping them Calm.




Us mama's have super powers and alongside the fact we give birth, can sustain a baby for months with milk our bodies make and of course those magic kisses that heal any wound, we can also regulate our baby's biology purely through the power of skin to skin contact.


Our mornings will continue to start with skin to skin cuddles and our weeks will continue to end with them.

Read more ⇨

Newborn Baby Wishlist

This is now my fourth baby and I have worked out what I really want and use, and what I don't.  Some of the things I thought were 'essentials' when I was pregnant with Dylan were never used and things I had never thought of became the bits I couldn't live without.

I am so excited to be carrying a baby girl this time, but I have found that for those very newborn purchases, most of the things I like are pretty unisex anyway.  I adore colour on babies, but I love a newborn in white still and whilst I am not anti - pink at all, I am not desperate to be surrounded by it either.

I have put together a little wishlist for when our baby girl arrives, just things for those first weeks, the newborn stage.

Newborn Baby Wishlist by beckygower featuring a playsuit romper

ELIZABETH Tan / White Rainbow Sleepsuits Three Pack (0mths-2yrs) / Buy John Lewis Baby Safari Animals Print Dress, Teal | John Lewis / The Little Green Sheep / Snuz Crib Bedding Set Cloud Nine The Little Green Sheep / Playsuit romper / Hot Air Balloon Tula Baby Carrier / TotsBots Teenyfit V4 Treasure / Swoon motion / celebration bamboo swaddles / Choose a Bundle - Poddle Pod UK / bugaboo-donkey-duo-black-off-white-f.jpg (600×600) / Wine Maroon Wrap Sling

With a small age gap this time (16 months) I will be alternating between a double buggy and a sling and single.  I love the Bugaboo donkey as I can have a carrycot and still have Finn facing me and for a newborn I will use mostly a stretchy wrap.  I will be using my Snuzpod again whch got carefully stored away after Finn outgrew it and I love the new collection of bedding, especially the grey and yellow.

For first clothes, I love Next sleepsuits and these rainbows are top of my list. I have added in a beautiful muslin romper for those hot summer days and a little dress too - after all this is the first girl after three boys.

The poddle pod looks great for keeping baby snug, as do the swaddle muslins, and if baby isn't keen on being swaddled then I find you can never have enough muslins, the larger ones are perfect to use as sheets in the carrycot too.

I fancy a nice changing bag again and mine broke very recently.  After three babies I definitely prefer a less baby and more Mama style and this looks elegant and practical.

What would you put on a wishlist, is there anything essential I have forgotten about?

Read more ⇨

My Top Five Products for a Feeding Mum

I have been the mum that would try breastfeeding with no pressure. I have been the mum hiding in a toilet, worried about breastfeeding in public.  I have been the mum that weaned onto bottles.  I have been the mum who knew she would breastfeed before her baby was even born.  I have been the mum proudly breastfeeding.  I have been the mum who breastfed a toddler.  I have been the mum that cup fed.  I have been the mum that bottlefeeds.  I have been the mum that does her very best for her babies, and makes sure they are fed, happy and growing.

I have breastfed, cup fed and bottle fed, and whilst there are some products brilliantly designed for a certain way of feeding, there are also a lot of products that are just fantastic for those mums that regularly feed their children.  Here are my top 5

-Muslins.

Muslins are genius things, so simple, so underated until you have a baby to feed, and then you realise their worth.  I used them as a light cover when I felt nervous feeding in public, I have used them as a burping cloth, and as a makeshift bib for a baby with reflux.  However I feed my baby, I make sure I have a muslin close at hand.

Read more ⇨

Newborn Keepsakes

Apparently a baby is considered a 'newborn' for the first 12 weeks, which means Finn only has a few days left until he is just a baby.  These first 12 weeks are both the fastest and the slowest I find.  In some ways it feels like no time at all since I held my son for the first time but life before Finn seems so long ago, it already feels like he has been around forever.

For each of my children, I have created a keepsake box full of memories from these early days.  I hope one day we can look back together, that they can show their own children and know how loved they are.  Finn's box will grow as he does, but there are so many things from this newborn stage that I want to keep hold of.

His first babygrow, the one I picked out for him after nearly an hour searching for the perfect one.  I bought it the same day we found out that he was a boy, and it was both the first sleepsuit he ever wore, and his 'coming home outfit' from the hospital.  He actually still fits in it, but as soon as it is outgrown, it will be saved.

His hospital tags that show just how tiny his little ankles were, back when his official name was just 'baby'.  I also have the first hospital tags with his name on them, after 10 days of deliberation we finally decided, and the hospital staff gave me his first named tags to put on his legs myself.

A newspaper from the day he was born - buying this wasn't top of my to-do list as I held my new baby, but for each of my boys, my mum has bought them a newspaper that will remind them of the world they were born into.

First photos are so special, and whilst Finn will grow up in a digital age, I think having a paper copy is priceless, and he will have some of my favourite photos from the early days printed out to store in his keepsake box.

When our baby arrived, our family and friends helped us welcome him, and their cards will always be treasured.  Finn will have all his 'welcome to the world' cards in his keepsake box to remind him how it wasn't just us who were excited for his arrival.

I still have all the scan photos, the little momentos from the very first time we saw our baby boy, and these are also in his special box.  We only had two scans with Finn, but I love the image of him hi5-ing the camera.

I still need to do some hand and footprints for Finn's baby keepsake box ( I have a kit from Tesco), he is still so tiny, and when he is a grown man, I know we will love looking back and remembering how big my little finger looked in his hand.

I know I will add more bits over the years, first shoes when he takes his first steps, the first masterpiece he creates, badges and certificates that he is proud of and plenty more.

What did you save for your children?

Disclaimer : Thanks to Tesco

Read more ⇨

The First Three Weeks

When our beautiful baby boy was handed to us three weeks ago, we had no idea what was in store for us.  He looked healthy and happy and as we counted his fingers and toes, wondered at how tiny he was and enjoyed those precious first moments, we had no idea it would be days before we could take him home and really start life as a family of five.

Our little Pretzel was born with a rare virus, which meant his first days were punctuated with tests and scans to try and find out more.  Thankfully many things which we find painful didn't seem to trouble the little guy who managed to frequently fall asleep during blood tests.  We were well looked after in the Special Care Baby Unit and once he had a diagnosis we could start all the relevant medicines.

After nearly three weeks, our baby was finally able to come home, and real life could start.  Things are not over and we were sent home with lots of medication and follow up appointments but our family is together, and on Monday night we all slept under the same roof.  We are so thankful to everyone who visited, messaged us, sent gifts, prayed for us and thought of us.  

Whilst there was plenty that wasn't positive about those first few weeks, the things I want to remember are those special moments, some completely ordinary, some more amazing because of the circumstances.

Read more ⇨

Pretzel's Birth Story

For some reason, despite having had two babies born before their due date, I was convinced that our little pretzel would be late.  At 39 weeks exactly, nothing was ready, the crib sat waiting in the box to be built, a half packed hospital bag had a list of things still to buy and to pack and the car seat to bring our little guy home in was stored away for 'nearer the time'. 

Tuesday 24th February was my first real day of maternity leave, and after dropping the bigger boys at nursery, I went to get my hair done - something I tried to plan as close to the arrival as possible so that in those first pictures I look nice and blonde.  I had a few very mild contractions throughout the morning, but they were completely irregular and not painful - I knew they were different to Braxton Hicks but I could go between 20 minutes and 2 hours between them.  

I came home for a quiet afternoon, a lie down on the sofa and some catch up TV, and collected the boys from nursery.  Nothing seemed to be happening, but I felt like this may be a slow lead up to the big day and once the boys were in bed, I decided we should really start getting organised!  I got the crib out and gave the bloke instructions on how to build it, and I finished up my hospital bag, packing those final tiny sleepsuits and nappies. 

At 10pm, I decided to have a bath, thinking it would either stop anything completely and buy me some more time, or start something real, but after an hour's soak without a single contraction I decided it was the former.

At 11pm as I climbed out I felt something, and suddenly there was a regularity.  I was having contractions every 5 minutes and they were about 30 seconds long.  I found my birth ball and supervised the rest of the crib building, waiting to see if they progressed.  I started practicing the hypnobirthing techniques I had learnt and the wave breathing and I felt in control.

At midnight, I rang my mum, who we were relying on to look after the other two, and told her to keep her phone nearby tonight.  She decided to come straight over as it was late, and arrived about 1pm.

By this point, things were pretty regular and I was struggling to talk through them.  I rang the midwife led unit and they agreed that I should come in to be checked.  We arrived at 1:30am, but during the taxi ride over, things had slowed down and by the time we walked in, I could walk and talk through contractions.  I was shown into a lovely room, similar to the one in which Archie was born, and told they would come back in when things picked back up.

At 2:30, I was examined by both the student midwife and the midwife in charge, and told I was 5cm dilated.  One went to fetch some gas and air in case I wanted it and the other started running the pool as I was hoping for another water birth.  Things suddenly picked up though, and the space between contractions was not long enough for me to climb off of the bed.  My birth had been active and perfect until then, but suddenly I felt like I was losing control.

I felt a lot of pressure and was told it was my waters bulging, I grabbed the gas and air and I pushed to try and pop them, but suddenly the midwife's were back at the bed and as I heard the waters go, I was told to just do another short push.  I had no idea what was going on at this point, but with a little push, my baby was born.

At 2:46 am after a 16 minute established labour, my baby boy was placed on my chest.  His head had been born still in the water, and I had birthed him on the bed as there was no time to get to the pool.  Due to a bleed, I had to have the injection to deliver my placenta, but I didn't care by this point.

A tiny pink baby was screaming, opening his little eyes and kicking his skinny legs.  A baby much smaller than we had envisaged but one who stole our hearts all over again.

Baby Pretzel was born 5 days early after a quick labour with only a couple of minutes gas and air.   He weighed 7lb 1oz and had dark hair and dark eyes.  He looked like both his big brothers, and totally different at the same time.

After a quick shower, we were moved to a different room for skin to skin cuddles, and as there was meconium in his waters, we were told it would be 12 hours before we could go home.

Unfortunately, we didn't make it home that night, and our little Pretzel is still in special care, where he is doing really well.  That is a whole other story though, and one I will write up once we are all home.

Read more ⇨

Hello Daisy Review and Giveaway

After 2 boys, it is safe to say our house has seen enough baby blue.  It looked lovely on Dylan, but it didn't take long for me to realise that it isn't the only colour little boys can wear, and for some it just doesn't suit them. I have always preferred Archie in brights and colours and it suits his personality.  Blogging has opened up my eyes to so many different styles of clothing, and I am loving finding some less 'baby blue' clothes ready for our newest arrival.

Hello Daisy asked me to check out their website and the first place I looked was the clothes.  I loved the colours and styles in the boys and unisex sections and how unique they were.  We chose a lovely organic sleepsuit ready for Pretzel's arrival next year and I can't wait to see our little guy in it! It is beautifully soft, feels well made and I just love the colour scheme.

Read more ⇨

My Big Boy

Although Dylan is my big boy (or so he keeps telling me), I have no doubt that he will always be my baby and every now and again I glimpse a little bit of that newborn he once was.

When he sleeps, so peacefully, his face has that lightness that only a child can have. 

 Rather than looking deep in sleep, his face looks open, beautiful and full of possibilities. 

As a little baby he had the same sleepy pout 

and I can't help but want to kiss that face every time I see it.

When he is tired and the blinks become longer and longer, 

thumb in his mouth, 

I see that precious and helpless little baby that is seems only yesterday I was rocking in my arms. 

 Now so independent, but still so little.

When he falls, trips or stumbles and only mummy kisses can make it better.

When he asks those questions, those innocent questions 

that show how much he has to learn about the world still.

When he wakes up from a nap, he has always taken a while to come round, 

and some days we snuggle on the sofa for half an hour,

 both with heavy eyes, 

enjoying the warmth and comfort,

 I am reminded of all those sleeps he had curled up on my chest as a little baby.

When his eyes light up at the simplest of things, 

a biscuit, the baubles on a Christmas tree, seeing his Grandma and Grandpa.  

The things that become everyday and ordinary after a while

 but are still magical when you are two and a quarter.

These moments, they let me remember that tiny baby who depended on me for everything, warmth, nutrition and comfort.  I see that beautiful squishy face, the little fingers that curled around mine and those precious tiny baby toes.  He may be growing up right in front of my eyes but there are moments where all I see is my little baby boy.

Read more ⇨

Natures Purest

Despite finding out that both my babies were boys before they were even born, I didn't go too crazy on the blue.  I think there is nothing more beautiful than a baby in white and cream and I am loving the products from Natures Purest as they are perfect for little bundles.

Everything is made from organically-grown, naturally coloured cotton and the neutral tones are perfect for boys and girls.  They sent us a beautifully wrapped, gorgeous cable knit blanket and until you have touched it yourself, you will not believe how soft it is.

I loved tucking Archie up in his moses basket with it and it is plenty big enough for him to snuggle under in the coming winter as well.  This is the perfect gift for a new baby as you can't help but want one for yourself.

They also sent Archie a gorgeous stuffed toy, which again is deceptively soft and he loves cuddling (and chewing) it.  

We love the products, the simplicity, the natural materials and how beautiful they are and would highly recommend them as a perfect new baby gift.

Disclaimer:  I was sent these products for the purpose of an honest review but they really are unbelievably soft!

Read more ⇨

A Little Cup of Perfection

I couldn't resist taking Archie for a newborn photo shoot and I also can't resist sharing my favourite snap with you here. 

This is my beautiful baby at 8 days old as photographed by the very lovely and very talented Kidz-Unlimited

This is why we had such a problem choosing a name other than 'Squish'  - Look at those gorgeous squishy cheeks!

Read more ⇨

Fisher Price Discover'n'Grow Bouncer Chair Review

Archie is a rather nosy baby and is no longer content spending his waking hours on his back.  He loves to look around and watch the world go by and with a noisy toddler around, he gets a full on sensory experience!  Fisher Price have sent us one of their Discover'N'Grow Bouncer and Archie has been loving his new chair.

Checking out the Giraffe

The chair comes with two removable arms that have toys well within the child's reach so that as soon as they start batting at things they can play.  One side has a musical feature when you move the arm and plays alternating music and animal sounds.  Archie seems to rather like the giraffe, and Dylan is desperate to play with the penguin.  

The bouncer also has a vibrate function which is genius for soothing and calming a baby.  Archie loves this feature although only for a few minutes but it is great to pop on whilst I am making lunch as I know he will be content in his chair for a while.

We have been busy putting this bouncer to the test for a few weeks now and we can definitely recommend it.  The harness ensures safety, the design is fun and engaging and Archie loves his new view on the world.  We have been chilling in the garden this week and he loves being able to watch his big brother play from the safety of his bouncer.

The only criticism I have is that there is no off switch for the music.  Although it is only set off by movement of the arm and so doesn't play music without input, I do like to be able to turn things off at the end of the day.

The Discover'n'grow bouncer retails at £49.99 and is suitable from birth until the child can sit unaided or reaches 25lb (whichever is first).  It requires and AAA and a D battery which are not included.

Disclaimer:  We were sent this bouncer for the purpose of a review but all thoughts and opinions are completely my own.

Read more ⇨

10 Reasons I Love being a Mummy

Being a parent is one of the hardest, yet possibly the most rewarding jobs in the world and I could spend all day coming up with reasons why I love it.  Here are my top ten reasons that I love being a Mum:


Morning Smiles

Somehow, all the tired tantrums of the day before and the constant night feeds are forgotten and forgiven when I see those cheeky little grins in the morning. I can't think of a better way to start the day.

Newborn Snuggles

A newborn baby curled up asleep on your tummy is one of the best feelings in the world.  Falling asleep with them cuddled up is priceless and now that I know how fast these early days go, I am enjoying my snuggles with Archie even more

Breastfeeding

Some people hate it, some people do it purely for the health benefits and some just love it.  I am in the latter category and I love the closeness, the cuddles and the fact that only I can fulfil this need for my baby boy.  Breastfeeding also burns 500 calories per day which is a giant bonus!

The Excuse to be a Big Kid

Suddenly it is completely acceptable to splash in puddles, roll down a hill and spend the day building sandcastles.  There is an inner child in me that has never grown up and I love being able to be silly, sporadic and  get messy with the boys.

The Pride

No matter where we are going, I feel myself standing taller when I push my gorgeous children around.  I am so proud of the beautiful babies that I made and I love to show the world.

Watching the Bloke
Not only do I get to be a mummy to two beautiful boys, I get to share the journey with my best friend and watch him become a father.  I get to witness the bond between him and his sons and see them learning about each other every day.

Pushchairs

Now I know this isn't for everyone, but I appear to have a bit of a buggy obsession, and I love checking out the gorgeous new designs.  Even if you are not a fan of pushchair shopping, you can't help but admit it is lovely not to have to carry shopping bags anymore!

Seeing the World in a New Way

Dylan's excited squeals of 'WOWEE' at everything from an ant on the floor to a biscuit helps me see the wonders of the world through fresh eyes.  This morning we stopped walking to watch and giggle at the leaves blowing down the street in the wind  - something I never would have noticed had it not been for the toddler by my side.  Seeing the world through fresh eyes is invigorating.

A Purpose

Before having Dylan I hadn't quite worked out who I was, what I wanted to do and where I was going. I found out I was pregnant and suddenly I had a purpose.  A direction.  Suddenly my life had a meaning that it didn't have before and I have so many more reasons to follow my dreams.

Grandchildren
I get to give my parents two beautiful grandsons and hopefully one day my boys will give me some grandchildren too.

So those are my ten, what would you add to the list?

Read more ⇨

Sleep

Sleeping through the night means something different to everyone.  A goal, a reality, a far off dream, something to brag about, something other people's children do and most importantly an eventuality.  Find me a teenager who doesn't sleep through the night and well into the next day!  Some children do it at 6 weeks, some at 6 years but I promise you, they all get there sometime and often when you least expect it.

Our sleeping journey was a lot like a seesaw.  In the hospital Dylan went 5 hours without a feed - presumably the exhaustion of being born was a little too much for him and I was told I needed to wake him at least every three hours to make sure he was feeding enough.  He clearly heard this as by 3 months old the longest he had done was 4 hours in one stint and it was usually hourly from then onwards. I accepted our night time cuddles and to some extent enjoyed them.  He didn't always make it back to his crib afterwards as  it was a little too often that we both fell asleep feeding.

One cold October day, something amazing happened.  My clever little boy found his fifth digit - the almighty thumb.  That night I woke up every hour from 11pm onwards to check he was still breathing, and when he eventually woke up at 7am  I was amazed and confused!  A month later and I was confident that my baby was sleeping through the night,  I had become cocky with my late nights and somehow felt even more exhausted than when up hourly.  

The day he turned four months old I had to drag myself out of bed at 2am for a feed and my body was heavy and tired.  The next night he added in a 4am feed too and two weeks later we were up every two hours for milky cuddles.  My beautiful sleeper was back to being a newborn, feeding at least 12 times in a 24 hour period! What went wrong?!

I was tempted to start weaning in the hope that food would fill him up, but also keen to do baby led weaning and wait until 6 months,  I was tempted to try controlled crying but worried he was hungry and not ready for the reality.  Most of all I wanted to do what was right for my son without having any idea what it was.  We got ourselves back into a night feed routine and I learnt that I could function quite well on these little nuggets of sleep.

At 5.5 months we started our weaning journey and on the first day, Dylan demolished an entire slice of toast.  He was definitely ready and as we had waited, so was his gut.  He took to food well trying everything we gave him and enjoying generous portions.  His sleep did not improve however and he was still having milk throughout the night.

Just after he turned 6 months things changed again.  I dressed him for bed one night, and carried him upstairs to the dark nursery.  We sat on the nursing chair and I gently rocked as I fed him to sleep - the same way I had since that first nervous night at home.  I watched his sleepy eyes close and after he had dropped off I stayed rocking, watching his angelic face relax.  After a few minutes I picked him up, ready to put him back in his cot when I saw those big blue eyes open and look at me.  This was not the plan!  We sat back down again and repeated but again he woke up!  Not knowing what to do, I put him down in the cot and headed downstairs to make myself a drink whilst we came up with a plan B.

I stopped on the stairs and heard. . . silence

I got to the bottom, and still silence.

Deciding to make the most of it I made myself a cup of tea.  Still silence.

I drunk my cup of tea in silence and then quietly sneaked up the stairs.  I poked my head round the door and saw my beautiful boy curled up, thumb in and eyes tight shut.  For the first time, he had put himself to sleep!

Knowing he could do it gave us both the confidence and that night he was only up twice.  I would hear a little wimper every now and again and then the noise of vigorous sucking as the thumb went in and a little sigh as he fell back asleep.  It was so easy!

Over the next two weeks I refused to feed him to sleep as we both knew he could do it.  Every nap time and every night I would place him down awake and he would sleep! By 7 months he was routinely sleeping 7pm to 8am and I am delighted to say at 20 months we have seen no regression.  I can comfortably say that my child is 'sleeping through'.  

It is nothing to do with my parenting, and nothing to do with his milk.  In fact we stopped bedtime milk at 6.5 months and he would have his last feed at 6pm.  His sleeping was down to him.  He learnt to do it and he loved it - he still loves his sleep!

Archie is already sleeping far better than Dylan did at his age, but we are a long way off my idea of 'sleeping through' and as much as I love my sleep (and I really, really do), every time he wakes in the night and cries out for milk and cuddles, I am reminded that he is my baby and that he needs me.  As I hold him close and watch him snuggle into me, we have our own special moments and I will be sad in a way when he eventually stops needing me to help him through the night.  Just like Dylan, Archie is without fail, fed to sleep, and although there are plenty of reasons not to get into this habit, I know that just like Dylan, he will eventually find his own way out of it.

My quest for a full night's sleep continues, but in the meantime, I am enjoying the cuddles.

Read more ⇨

As Snug as a Bug in a Rug - Review and Giveaway

It is that awkward time of year where it is not quite cold enough for a full on padded snow suit  but I still want to wrap Archie up and a cardigan just doesn't seem as snug.  Babyrug's innovative Bug in a Rug is a cross between clothing and a blanket and is perfect for this weather.  

The bug has a space for little legs and the elastic round the ankles stops the baby kicking them off.  The middle section is a wrap over though, meaning a sleeping baby can be unwrapped with having to fiddle too much or wake them up.  Perfect if you are coming in from the cold outdoors and they are fast asleep.

The separate leg holes mean that the bug in a rug is so versatile.  It can be used in an infant car-seat,  in a carry-cot or pushchair and even in a sling, unlike a blanket, and the micro fleece material means it is lovely and warm.

We have been testing the pale blue version on our newest addition and he seems to like it!  I often wear him in a wrap and a snow suit is not practical so this is the perfect alternative for us.  I love it in the carry-cot too as I find Archie can get too hot in a full on snow suit with the apron on as it tends to trap in the warm air.  The Bug in a Rug is the perfect thickness and allows him to have a kick around as we travel.  The Bug folds up so small, that it easily slots into the nappy bag if we are planning on staying out later and don't trust the Great British weather.

I did find that the crossover body section didn't keep Archie's arms in as much as I would have liked, but I am not sure if this is him getting to the end of the size or not.  I would love to see the velcro coming furthur round the body so I could wrap it slightly tighter and keep his arms wrapped up too.

We are really enjoying using the bug in a rug and it is perfect for our little man as he is often in the pram for part of the day and in the sling for the rest, so it gives us more versatility than a blanket without compromising on his warmth.

Baby Rug not only sell warm winter wraps, but also light cotton wraps, perfect for protecting a little baby's skin from the sunshine, whilst keeping them cool - much easier than rubbing in sunscreen every 30 minutes!  I have one of the gorgeous summer wraps to give away to a reader and entry couldn't be simpler, just follow the instructions on the rafflecopter below!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Disclaimer:  I was provided with a bug in a rug for the purpose of this review, but all thoughts and opinions are completely my own.

ThePrizeFinder - UK Competitions

Read more ⇨