The Adventure of Parenthood: Being Me

Thursday, 6 June 2013

Being Me

Since becoming a parent, I have become so caught up in . . . well . . . being a parent, that I look back on the photos of pre-baby me and barely recognise myself.  I spend my days with two beautiful boys, and spend my evenings writing about them,  to then go to sleep with the littlest right by my side.

Now I am not complaning about this - I wouldn't swap my life for anything right now, but I am wondering whether it is time to start focusing a little more on me as well. 

I looked a lot less tired pre-baby

I used to love reading books and my journey to and from Cybher this weekend saw me finally finishing a book I started reading long before Archie was even born.  Putting the laptop down half an hour earlier a few nights a week to read a little shouldn't be hard and I am looking forward to working my way through the growing pile of literature on my bookcase.

I used to run.  Not that far or that fast, but I loved the freedom, the space, the fresh air and the energy it gave me.  Running was my time to reflect and I do all my best thinking on foot.  I got out of the habit through pregnancy and have been too lazy to get back into it, but this mummy tummy is not going to shift itself and with the seafront only a couple of minutes jog away, I have the perfect reason to start up again.

A few days before Dylan was born.

I used to be creative, but now my projects are all half finished (or not even started).  I want to make an effort to finish one thing every month, even if it is only little and get back to my sewing machine again as it is long neglected.

Before having children, the bloke and I used to eat out regularly, watch lots of films and spend whole nights just chatting.  Now we are more often than not found on our seperate computers, blogging or playing zombie games. I want to introduce a date night every now and again where we make sure we find a babysitter and go and enjoy each other's company.  One day the children will leave home and I still want a best friend to share my life with.

Pre- babies

I am not sure how easy it will be to break the habits, and my little nest in our sofa is rather comfortable but I really feel it is time to get a better balance of mummy and me. 

Do you still enjoy the same things you did pre-baby?

9 comments:

  1. I completely understand this, Bex. I get maybe 30 minutes a day to do something of my choosing just for me and Paul works incredibly long hours so we rarely get any time together. I just keep telling myself that this is the busiest, most relentless time of our lives and that slowly but surely we will snatch a few more minutes and build them up to hours. I'm just giving in to it for now or it'll drive me crazy.

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  2. I've worked really hard to keep some of the things that are 'me'. Some things have fallen by the wayside because I simply don't have the time, reading is sadly one of these. But other things I've really worked at keeping a part of my life, like dancing and sewing and photography. And then blogging is almost like a cross over hobby, it's something for me that benefits our family as well.
    I think time for yourself and your hobbies and interests is really important and easy to forget. Good luck with trying to grab a bit more time for you. x

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  3. I totally get where you are coming from with this post because I literally just wrote something so similar on my own blog about needing a balance of being 'Mum' and being 'Me'. I think it's all too easy for us parents to neglect ourselves because our baby's need us. But actually our baby's need us to be recharged and energised rather than run down, tired and grouchy and at times a shadow of our former selves.

    Alex
    Bump to Baby

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  4. I think it is really hard to get me time when you have two little ones. I literally don't switch off, I am with them all day and then I write about them all night and do other things relating to my blog. I wouldn't change it because I adore them, but it is tiring and I sometimes do wish I had some more me time. Mr E and I have never had a night away from the kids and Mads is 2 and a half. I think once I have stopped breastfeeding I am going to put more effort into having me time. But thats still probably 9 months away haha! x

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  5. I think you have to prioritise the things that make your soul sing. For me, we'll I was blogging long before babies so that stayed, albeit with a different focus, and I make sure that I have time to knit, sew, take photos, and cook - they're my recharging multivitamin. I do a lot less of all than I used to but every little helps. And if all else fails, just abandon the housework, it'll still be there in the morning.

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  6. I think it is so important to have me time but the only time I get to myself at the moment is when I have a bath in the evening! I know Jobey is still really young though and that it will get easier. I used to love reading too but just haven't had the time since Iyla was born. It's definitely something I want to get back into. I also want to start going to some exercise classes in the near future to feel good about my body. Blogging is also something I do for me, it's hard to find time at the moment though, I get about an hour in the evening when Jobey isn't feeding and I get to go on my laptop! I do have a hair appt on Sat morning though which I am so excited about, 2 hours of reading mags on my own is going to be amazing! x

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  7. This is all too true and why I started my blog and named it beingmebeingmum. Goog back to work made me think about needing to be more than a mum, like you said thebabies will leave one day and I still want to be me, have hobbies, interests, friends and a good relationship with my husband after this amazing time is behind us. I love my little man and I recognise how important it is for both of us that I stay being me xxx

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  8. Oh my God, there is a dent in my sofa Liska shaped. Recreation is blogging where it used to be Yoga :-(
    We haven't had a date night since Aaron was born, and yet he will be 3 in a few short days.
    This post could so so so easily have been written by me, only that I wouldn't be able to include such glamorous photos LOL.
    Great post and obviously I can relate a lot.
    Last night I stayed up two hours after I got tired and every request I made of the hubby (even for conversation) was met with "I'm busy" - he was on computer. We both often are.
    I often wish the darn things weren't invented :-(
    Liska x

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  9. I totally agree with you. Hubby and I have said we need a date night to make more effort, we too sit next to each other on our computers! lol! I feel better since I have started my diet too. I just need to go to bed earlier. I am loving your top pic by the way. You look fabbie x

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