Thursday 17 September 2015

The First Day

I feel lucky in a way that we are one of the last to start - I have watched all Dylan's friends pop up on facebook looking smart in a new school uniform and heard off for their first days.  Some have run in and not looked back, some have had to be peeled off of parents, and nearly all of them have come home exhausted after their half days.  I have managed to fit in a couple of last minute family trips - the last we can really take during term time and I have spent every day with this boy who is on the cusp of change.

I have had to watch them all though, knowing we are on a countdown until I help him put his smart black shoes on the right feet, and pack his water bottle into his new book bag.  I knew our day would come, and now it has.  My baby boy, who I am sure was a newborn just last week is now four and it is time for his next adventure.

I know things may not change all of a sudden, but I am under no illusion that they won't.  His friends that I carefully chose for him have gone to other schools, and he will be able to pick his own.  I won't know what he is doing for the most part of every day. He will be exposed to words and stories and actions that I can't control, he will learn things that I don't teach him, he will run to someone else for a cuddle when he gets hurt instead of me.

My baby boy has just turned four, he is still so young, so full of innocence and trust.  I have tried to explain the foreverness of his life, that infant school will be followed by Juniors, then secondary then either more education or work.  It will be seventy years before he can contemplate spending every day as he does now - carefree and with no concept of time.  

I think most of my apprehension around him starting is selfish.  He has been by my side for four years, my little buddy.  I love that we can do what we want, stay out late when the weather is nice, jump in every puddle and then run home to put on a onesie and have hot chocolate.  I am not known for punctuality and I am dreading the 9am and 3pm school run every day.  I will miss him and I know that his little brothers will too.

I hope he enjoys school.  I hope his teacher recognises what a wonderful little person he is.  I hope he makes friends easily, that he likes the lunches, that he can get changed into his p.e kit on his own, that he comes out telling me all about it.  I am so proud of him, my biggest baby boy.


  1. Oh what a beautiful post! I hope he had a wonderful first day; somehow he manages to look both all grown up and so very very little at the same time in your pictures!

  2. Such a lovely & heartbreaking post, made me tear up a bit! I really hope this new journey will be an exciting one for Dylan, You & the whole family as well! :)
    Have a relaxing weekend ahead!

  3. Aww bless, big hugs and I hope he had a wonderful time at school. I know it's hard. Big hugs xx


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