Maternity leave leaves you with a lot of free time, and with the majority of friends working during the day, not much to do with it. Making new friends is the perfect solution to this, and Children's centres are the way forward.
I had always associated Surestart with a lower class 'chav' mummy, but took the plunge and visited my local centre when Dylan was about 5 weeks old. The customary visits from friends and family were starting to become few and far between and I was starting to crave more company. I attended 'Baby Massage' as it had been recommended to me by a friend, and will always be grateful that I did.
The class was disappointingly absent of the stereotypical chav mummy, and instead full of lovely like minded mums who were welcoming, helpful and overly enthusiastic on the childbirth chat front. The group was followed by the 'Breast feeding support group' and I thought what the hell and stayed for that too. It is all thanks to this group that I discovered how many places on the high street have a feeding room offering discreet breast feeding when you are out and about. More importantly, it is due to this group that I made my mummy friends.
Nothing helps you to bond quite like tea and biscuits, and they were plentiful. Booby group can also be credited with my descent into cloth nappy land. The friends I made in those first couple of weeks are now friends I see almost every day. Our children are the same age, our interests are the same, our maternity leaves coincide (although the friendships will go further than those 9 months), and conveniently, we all live round the corner from one another.
Mummy friends are the inevitable outcome from attending a Children's Centre, and it was the best thing I could have done. My mummy friends know my son almost as well as I do, and know exactly how I like my tea! Days of boredom are banished, and swimming trips and days out at the zoo are in. Mummy friends are the perfect people with whom to enjoy this stage of my life, and to share worries, frustrations and achievements with.
Where did you meet 'mummy friends' and how important are they to you?
We didn't have a children's centre here when Imogen was a baby, but going to the local mum & baby group was the best thing I ever did. Four years later we're still all in contact, the whole group of us go out for an evening meal minus kids around every three months, and I've made a couple of true best friends that I see all the time, and my kids and their kids really get on well with eachother which helps!
ReplyDelete'Mummy friends' have been very important to me, it's nice too see you've found a nice group too :)
We are having a night out minus babies soon, looking forward to it! I don't know much about mum and baby groups locally but might look into it.
DeleteIt's very interesting to watch how your friendships change when you have children. It's not easy to maintain friendships with a child especially with friends who aren't parents. I found I keep in touch with most of my non mummy friends via facebook now and see mostly my mummy friends. Therefore mummy friends are the most important kind! x
ReplyDeleteI am exactly the same. Thank god for facebook! Can't imagine what people did without it.
DeleteFriendship dynamics do change when you have children - it's important to have a good mix of mummy and 'non-mummy' friends x
ReplyDeleteI don't know how I ever fitted working into my life, I need more time in the day to keep up to date with friends now. Thank goodness for facebook!
DeleteWell nearly 25 years after my first child I'm still friendly with several Mums. However the children don't see each other anymore! Still good meeting up and finding how the children have all gone their own ways!
ReplyDelete