This Too Shall Pass

I can no longer remember Dylan's baby cry.  I know he sounded like a newborn once upon a time though, all those months ago.  I know that his cry has not always been the toddler wail that it is now, but I can't remember the old sound at all.

I can still picture his first wonky smile though, with his tongue looking almost twisted in his mouth and his eyes lit up with excitement.  I can still remember that first beautiful giggle as I kissed his neck, and how long we spent trying to get him to make that perfect sound again.

I know that Dylan fed through the night for many months, sometimes once, sometimes every hour and I know that there were days when I was so tired, so fed up and probably wishing the time away until he was bigger and sleeping better.  When I look back on those first few months though, what I remember is picking him up, latching him on and watching his perfect features settle into a calm and dreamy state as he curled into my body and felt safe.  I remember wanting to freeze that moment and feeling at peace myself.  I remember those special moments between us, proudly showing off my baby to the world in constant wonder at this little person that I had created.  I remember being amazed by him every single day.

As Archie is hitting a rather difficult patch, waking more and more frequently in the night, I am trying to remind myself that it is only a phase.  We will get through it and as big as it may seem now, in the grand scale of things it is tiny.  This stage will pass and become just a memory, barely even that.  When I look back at my seven month old baby, I will smile at the way he giggled at his brother, the excitement in his eyes as he bounces in his jumperoo and the way he cuddled into me like I was the only thing in the world that mattered.  

I will know that he didn't sleep well, but that hungry, sleepy cry will be a sound I can't quite remember, replaced by a full belly laugh and the raspberrys he blows at every opportunity.

The memories of mornings spent with a hot coffee in my hands waiting for the caffeine to hit will be but tales to tell my teenagers that are still in bed at midday with no signs of surfacing and I will look at them wondering where those two little boys were, who woke up with the biggest smiles on their faces even at 6am.  The nights will never be as long again, the mornings never quite as early as they are now, these days will pass.

There are so many precious moments that I want to remember from these early months, that there will be no space for the sleepless nights and the baby cries.  Every stage is just that, something that will pass, whether it be good or bad and when I am up for the umpteenth night feed, I am trying to remember just that.  This too shall pass, and it will be but a distant memory - make sure you have enough of the great memories to shadow it out.


p.s Archie's gorgeous outfit was sent to us from the lovely people a Name It - review to come soon