Thursday 26 September 2013

This Too Shall Pass

I can no longer remember Dylan's baby cry.  I know he sounded like a newborn once upon a time though, all those months ago.  I know that his cry has not always been the toddler wail that it is now, but I can't remember the old sound at all.

I can still picture his first wonky smile though, with his tongue looking almost twisted in his mouth and his eyes lit up with excitement.  I can still remember that first beautiful giggle as I kissed his neck, and how long we spent trying to get him to make that perfect sound again.

I know that Dylan fed through the night for many months, sometimes once, sometimes every hour and I know that there were days when I was so tired, so fed up and probably wishing the time away until he was bigger and sleeping better.  When I look back on those first few months though, what I remember is picking him up, latching him on and watching his perfect features settle into a calm and dreamy state as he curled into my body and felt safe.  I remember wanting to freeze that moment and feeling at peace myself.  I remember those special moments between us, proudly showing off my baby to the world in constant wonder at this little person that I had created.  I remember being amazed by him every single day.


As Archie is hitting a rather difficult patch, waking more and more frequently in the night, I am trying to remind myself that it is only a phase.  We will get through it and as big as it may seem now, in the grand scale of things it is tiny.  This stage will pass and become just a memory, barely even that.  When I look back at my seven month old baby, I will smile at the way he giggled at his brother, the excitement in his eyes as he bounces in his jumperoo and the way he cuddled into me like I was the only thing in the world that mattered.  
I will know that he didn't sleep well, but that hungry, sleepy cry will be a sound I can't quite remember, replaced by a full belly laugh and the raspberrys he blows at every opportunity.

The memories of mornings spent with a hot coffee in my hands waiting for the caffeine to hit will be but tales to tell my teenagers that are still in bed at midday with no signs of surfacing and I will look at them wondering where those two little boys were, who woke up with the biggest smiles on their faces even at 6am.  The nights will never be as long again, the mornings never quite as early as they are now, these days will pass.


There are so many precious moments that I want to remember from these early months, that there will be no space for the sleepless nights and the baby cries.  Every stage is just that, something that will pass, whether it be good or bad and when I am up for the umpteenth night feed, I am trying to remember just that.  This too shall pass, and it will be but a distant memory - make sure you have enough of the great memories to shadow it out.


p.s Archie's gorgeous outfit was sent to us from the lovely people a Name It - review to come soon


24 comments:

  1. I know exactly what you mean - my friend (who has a 5 month old) said that her daughter cries just like my Little Z used to and I had to stop and think about how he used to cry. I eventually remembered and I almost missed it too. All the stages are so lovely and some so hard and when they pass its so bittersweet

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is indeed bittersweet as I really don't want to wish away these amazing baby days but you can't help but want them to sleep better!

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  2. You're right. It is just a phase but when you're getting out of bed for the 12th time at night to settle them back off to sleep, its hard to remain positive!

    xx

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    Replies
    1. It is indeed, and the 5am starts don't make it easy either. Thank goodness they wake up looking so cute and smiley!

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  3. Lovely post. It's important to remind yourself of all the best bits... or write them down so you don't forget :o) Hope the night wakings settle down soon for you x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, we actually had a really good night straight after I posted this but I have a feeling it is a one off

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  4. Just a phase it may be, but it sounds like a tough one, I hope you are all more settled soon. I know I cling to the best bits, especially when the going is a bit rocky, but the tears are part and parcel of the whole, and I don't want to forget them, or brush them under the carpet either.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They are, and without the hard days we wouldn't appreciate quite how amazing the good ones are!

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  5. Lovely post! He is getting so big! I always think it must be so weird for our parents seeing up become adults and remembering the newborns they once held. Doesn't bear thinking about the time when that will be us!

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    Replies
    1. I try not to even consider that, I can't believe one day my babies will have babies of their own!

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  6. It will pass, it takes time, but it will pass. I wish time would slow down for our babies x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tell me about it, 7 months already! It is so bittersweet as you want a good night's sleep, but you also want them to stay little

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  7. Such a lovely post- and all the more beautiful because it is so true.
    I think the difference is with one you can sleep when they sleep whereas with a toddler as well it's just not an option.
    But yes, yes, and yes, I miss it so much and the boys are only 32mths and yet, there's so much which I hold onto- it's passed but they're my babies- end of.

    ReplyDelete
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